Send Her Back

Send Her Back

You know, it's funny. We've watched racist moment after racist moment be excused by sycophants of the Orange Fuhrer. We've watched the Republican Party betray all of it's supposed 'values' for a reality...

It All Feels Like Drunk UBER

by | Feb 6, 2019 | Opinion | 0 comments

Paying attention to the news over the past few years feels like drunk UBER.

Imagine if all you used to get around was UBER and every time a car showed up the driver had just downed a bottle of Fireball.

Since you had to get somewhere and drunk UBER was the only option you’d hop in and immediately fasten your seatbelt. Somehow you’d always get where you’re going, but the entire ride would be one near miss after another.

Running red lights, driving on the wrong side of the road, constantly changing lanes, tailgating everyone, the driver yelling out the window, just every kind of horrible driving each time you use UBER.

You never get hurt, you’re never late, you don’t have to wait long for a ride, but every fucking time you use drunk UBER you almost have a heart attack. That’s what it feels like right now if you spend too much time watching the news.

Go outside.

Go for a walk.

Do some pushups.

Watch some porn.

Do anything, just walk away from the news before somebody drives you into a fucking brick wall.

Follow Us

[et_social_follow icon_style="slide" icon_shape="rounded" icons_location="left" col_number="3" outer_color="dark" network_names="true"]
Mike G.

Mike G.

5th Beastie

I'm just a guy doing the best I can with the tools at my disposal. 


Submit a Comment

Go Ahead, Call Me Fredo One More Time!

Go Ahead, Call Me Fredo One More Time!

All day I'm seeing people saying that 'Fredo' isn't the 'N Word' for Italians. I disagree. Sure, to the rest of society, and in the big, it's not the N Word. But to Italians? I said it before...

%d bloggers like this: